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List Price: $25.99 | | Publisher: William Morrow
Salesrank: 57570
Released: August 25, 2009 |
| Our Price: $11.43 |
| Used Price: $7.45 |
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| Media: Hardcover |
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Editorial Review:
Her mother was a brainy knockout with the sultry beauty of Marilyn Monroe, a raconteur whose fierce wit could shock an audience into hilarity or silence. Her father was a distinguished figure in American letters, the National Book Awardwinning author of four of the greatest novels of World War II ever written. A daughter of privilege with a seemingly fairy-tale-like life, Kaylie Jones was raised in the Hamptons via France in the 1960s and '70s, surrounded by the glitterati who orbited her famous father, James Jones. Legendary for their hospitality, her handsome, celebrated parents held court in their home around an antique bar—an eighteenth-century wooden pulpit taken from a French village church—playing host to writers, actors, movie stars, film directors, socialites, diplomats, an emperor, and even the occasional spy. Kaylie grew up amid such family friends as William Styron, Irwin Shaw, James Baldwin, and Willie Morris, and socialized with the likes of Truman Capote, Norman Mailer, George Plimpton, and Kurt Vonnegut.
Her beloved father showed young Kaylie the value of humility, hard work, and education, with its power to overcome ignorance, intolerance, and narrow-mindedness, and instilled in her a love of books and knowledge. From her mother, Gloria, she learned perfect posture, the twist, the fear of abandonment, and soul-shattering cruelty. Two constants defined Kaylie's childhood: literature and alcohol. "Only one word was whispered in the house, as if it were the worst insult you could call someone," she writes, "alcoholic was a word my parents reserved for the most appalling and shameful cases—drunks who made public scenes or tried to kill themselves or ended up in the street or in an institution. If you could hold your liquor and go to work, you were definitely not an alcoholic."
When her father died from heart failure complicated by years of drinking, sixteen-year-old Kaylie was broken and lost. For solace she turned to his work, looking beyond the man she worshipped to discover the artist and his craft, determined that she too would write. Her loss also left her powerless to withstand her mother's withering barbs and shattering criticism, or halt Gloria's further descent into a bottle—one of the few things mother and daughter shared. From adolescence, Kaylie too used drink as a refuge, a way to anesthetize her sadness, anger, and terror. For years after her father's death, she denied the blackouts, the hangovers, the lost days, the rage, the depression. Broken and bereft, she began reading her father's novels and those writers who came before and after him—and also pursued her own writing. With this, she found the courage to open the door on the truth of her own addiction.
Lies My Mother Never Told Me is the mesmerizing and luminously told story of Kaylie's battle with alcoholism and her struggle to flourish despite the looming shadow of a famous father and an emotionally abusive and damaged mother. Deeply intimate, brutally honest, yet limned by humor and grace, it is a beautifully written tale of personal evolution, family secrets, second chances, and one determined woman's journey to find her own voice—and the courage to embrace a life filled with possibility, strength, and love.
Lies My Mother Never Told Me: A Memoir Reviews:
Interesting Memoir 
2009-11-25 - Kaylie Jones, the daughter of renowned author James Jones (author of From Here to Eternity and more) writes a poignant tale of her upbringing and life as the daughter in an alcoholic family. Kaylie is obviously a brilliant woman and shares her experiences intelligently and with passion.
I recognize that Kaylie has had some very difficult times but as I read the book there were obviously good times also. I did feel that she tended to gloss over those and focus on the hardships. A lot of people do not have the best of childhoods. Many never fully receive the love they need and deserve from there parents. Kaylie's alcoholic mother was verbally abusive and could be very overbearing but she could also be very generous. Kaylie did have a strong relationship with her dad but unfortunately he died when she was in her teens. She tries to continue her tie with her dad after his death by delving into books he loved.
In many ways Kaylie's story is no different than others who have lived under negative circumstances. But the backdrop of the story is a rich one and thus the story is like watching the perfect fairytale family from afar only when one gets up close it is not so perfect after all.
~ Lee Mellott
Fantastic way to bury the demons.
2009-11-24 - I didn't know about the writer's existance until I read this book. The book deals with the truth of her life and her parents but above all that it has a strong message going out to readers like me. Had I never read this book, I would have become a degenerate alcholic. It is not like I don't drink anymore but I really feel saved from ever relying completely on it. This deals with all the attrocities of being an alcholic and how it effects you and others around you. This book has little to do with writers or the lives or her father but it has more to do with just how helpess the disease can make you feel. How it becomes the soul thing ones life depends on. A very important book but I wouldn't just recommend it to everyone. You'll run into the lives of many celebrities while reading. Thank you, author.
One of the best books I've read in years... 
2009-11-23 - This is the second time I have read this book in a month, from cover to cover... a first for me! I am left speechless at the lyrical writing which describes some of the most horrendous experiences of an Adult Child of Alcoholics, including the guilt and co-dependency and never-ending desire to be loved that every child of an alcoholic never gives up, no matter how much they are mistreated by the parent that abuses them. I have put off writing this review for as long as I could, as I am literally speechless. Some of the descriptions could have been plucked from my own childhood, and even when I was well-aware of my father's drinking (and my mother's rages) many of the rest of the family stayed, and stays, in a state of denial, including me. Seeing the devastation and dangers of a continued relationship with what sounded like a raging Borderline-Disordered actively alcoholic mother and maintaining that relationship "for the sake of the grandchild" also left me speechless... seeing that this is exactly what I did with my own child, ultimately to my own ever-lasting detriment.
The author gets her black belt in Tae-Kwon Do during the entire process of letting go of the need and desire for her mother's love and approval, which she has never had and never will have, and in very real terms shines as a guiding light for us all that never had what we so fervently believe we need... the love and approval of an alcoholic family system that is simply not wired to ever be able to give it. Alcohol truly does "poison the mind." Read this book if you want to find out.
Kaylie Jones, daughter of the award-winning author James Jones ("The Thin Red Line" and other stories) is to be commended on every level for writing her story. It must have been an excruciatingly painful one to write, but gives everyone in the same predicament (including me) the courage to go on. Thank you, Kylie, forever more. You have no idea the gift and the strength you have given us all. The world needs more stories like yours.
Heart Wrenching 
2009-11-11 - What an extraordinary writter. Memories intact and delivered so bravely. We rear our children as we were reared. With that said an alchoholic mother is not the most ideal parent. Heart wrenching and uterly honest is Kaylie Jones memoir. God Bless her ability to write so profoundly about her childhood and prevail.
Interesting life, slowly written 
2009-11-01 - Kaylie Jones is the daughter of Gloria and James Jones, the famous writer of From Here to Eternity and The Thin Red Line. This memoir begins with the story of the young family together, in a creative, fast moving, wild environment. Much of this lifestyle was fueled by alcohol, which seemed to be ever-present in their lives. While Kaylie adored her father, she and her mother had a bitter, anger-filled relationship. After her father dies when Kaylie is fairly young, her life, as well as her mother's, descends rapidly into complete alcoholism. This portion of the memoir is two stories in one - Kaylie's alcoholism, Gloria's alcoholism. Is this an addiction that can be overcome? Can people help themselves or each other, to overcome it? This is the primary focus of the second portion of this book.
I did finish this book, but only after a concerted effort. I forced myself to pick it up repeatedly, but never felt the effort was worth it. While the life of Kaylie Jones certainly could be interesting, my first complaint with the book is that it was way too long. It easily could have been edited back some so that the reader could focus more on the interesting or memorable points of the author's life. Instead, we get everything - no focus whatsoever, meaning that the book drags. My second complaint is too much name-dropping - it comes across as a desperation to prove the author is important. When the famous person adds something to the story, when their presence reveals something about anyone, great. When it's just mentioning names to mention names, not so great. The beginning of the story, Kaylie's life with her parents, is worth reading, but the interest level drops after her father passes away.
